Friday, July 21, 2006

People say the dumbest things ...

Is it just that I’m now a crotchety disabled person, or are people really this stupid? I’ve been told that I have a great attitude (just again the other night, so, there!) and I generally keep a smile on my face, but it’s hard enough with everything I’m going through then to have to deal with comments/questions like the ones that follow, and yes, these are actual things that have been said to me. I've written out my imagined responses for your reading pleasure and also as a warning. If you see me, please oh, please DON'T say any of these things to me, or at least don't expect me to smile at while you say them.

A neighbor, upon seeing me shuffling along with my cane: "Oh, is your back really that bad?"
Me: “Oh, good gracious, no! You know how it is, I really like to walk around with the cane, it slows me down so delightfully, I think I’ll never be without it again!”
Alternate response: “Sshh! I’m faking it for the sympathy! Now get the door for me before I nail you in the shins with this thing!”

A neighbor, upon seeing me shuffling along with my cane: "Are you still waiting for surgery?"
Me: “Actually, I’ve had myself taken off the list for surgery; I’m finding walking around in pain and exhaustion incredibly uplifting. Do try it, it’s better than yoga!”

A neighbor, upon seeing me shuffling along with my cane: "How’s your back?"
Me: “How’s it look, asshole?”

A neighbor, upon seeing me shuffling along with my cane:"Have you tried yoga/a chiropractor/acupuncture/swimming/stretching/physical therapy?"
Me: “Have you tried being a sentient being? Dear GOD, can you see that I can’t hold up my upper body on my own? Why don’t you figure out how much your upper body weighs and then carry that weight around in a backpack on your back and see how able you are to do yoga/swimming/stretching, etc. And don’t get me started on physical therapy. I’ve made more progress on my own than I did with the PT harassing me about ‘making progress’ with her cookie cutter ‘back strengthening’ program that was causing more damage than good.”

A neighbor, upon seeing me shuffling along with my cane: "Glad to see you are improving!"*
Me: "What are you comparing it with that *this* looks better than anything? I mean sure, at least I’m up out of bed, but I’m walking like an old crone with a bag of sticks on her back, all bent and slow. Even though the pain is better, the walking gets worse by the week. WTF?"
*Special note for blog readers, don’t come here and just skim the entries and then make a thoughtless comment like the one above. It's just insulting is what it is, and it really pisses me off.

Wanna know what TO say? Compliment my cane, my attitude, my smile, my hair; things like that are a LOT easier to smile through.


Blogger Urbain said...

Hi Ingrid,

Your smile is wonderful i see it.
You are a beautiful girl from New York city.
With the winning smile and beautiful hair.
Is it now long or short(your hair) today Ingrid.
No matter you are always looking good.
You are a princess of my heart.
I hope that you will be my friend forever and that you understand
my very bad english. I hope and i'm shure your pain will go away soon.
I pray for you all day and that you will be very happy again.
Your friend
Have a saying it well for you Ingrid? ;))

8:18 PM  
Anonymous Ranabass - George said...

Reading the above comment from Urbain made my eyes well up.

I am crossing my fingers that the 24th is somehow a pleasant surprise. Now, how is it that I can see that smile more often? Right now I am gonna have to go dig around and find an image of it just to satisfy me for today, but other wise, I must plea, that I find a new photo of it on FLickr VERY soon!

8:03 PM  
Blogger HeroXJimmy said...

Oh Ingrid... I wish I had your strength, resiliance and humor. I am going through some very similar things as you... albeit a different condition... but it is hard not to respond to people as you suggest. I love reading your blog because it makes me want to pull myself out of this hole that I have been in. I am doing it. I got sober, (again!), I have a new Dr. I finally got Medicaid and am working on SSDI, started a new drug cocktail...11 various pills... all fun, good times. I have not had a seziure in about a month and a half, and have gone from 127 lbs to 153 lbs. So of course everyone is treating me as though I am "cured". I hate to go on about all of this, all I do is complain and expose all of this bitterness that no one wants to hear. So when I hear how much better I look and how I can now have my life back, etc... I just say thank you.

Seriously, I have not been able to write or vent with my extremely amateur photography... I remain in hiding up in this cabin. I am trying so hard to pull out of this. Laying in bed and sliding further down is not helping... and for some reason unbeknowst to me, my body will not give up and let me go. So I try. I will try today to post a few pictures on Flickr in your honor today.

By the way, I find the combination of your hair and eyes to be beyond spectacular and as far as canes go, you picked a good one. I will be in New York soon, (after my teeth get fixed.. won't bore you with that nightmare right now), and I will track you down.. would love to see you!

Godspeed to you for tomorrow. I will be in the hospital myself, so I will put my thoughts towards you and try to get out of myself.

Much Love,
Hero and Jimmy

7:41 AM  

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