This was the week that was ...

... not so good. The trains are rolling again, so to speak, and I’m able to take the Ultram again, thank goodness. I was a day and a half without it, and don’t want to go through that again. For some reason, the pain on my left side, through the hip and down in to my leg, is really, really bad along with some numbness in the leg and the bottom of my foot. Any movement, even with the Ultram and Tylenol, feels like something is being ripped from my spine. Turning over in bed requires a level of effort and finesse similar to parallel parking (and I don’t drive, so there). I actually have calluses on my hands from gripping the newels on the headboard so tightly and so often. Last night, I laid awake from 2:30 until about 4, immobile with pain, worrying about taking too much of the pain medicine and getting blocked up again, or, my worst fear, fucking up my liver with all this stuff. I am obsessive/ compulsively checking my eyes for any trace of yellow every day.

Tyler talked to the NP in Balderston’s office yesterday. It seems that they now have to take all the patients on the waiting list for the surgery that are covered by Workmen’s Comp for some bureaucratic reason or another. So whenever the surgery was going to happen, which we didn’t know to begin with, but I thought I would be first after the
FDA approval and now I’m not, and depending on how many workmen’s comp people there are on the list, this could push my surgery back by, who knows? Weeks? Months? She either didn’t tell Tyler or he’s not telling me because he knows I won’t be able to stand it. Let's hope next week is better.